Desiphering What God is Telling me

OK, so I have been reading the bible regularly-though not writing about my readings. I haven't forgotten about my page, like I normally do, but I just can't figure out what God is trying to teach me through the readings I have been doing.

I would use a bible study helper, but I really like finding my own meaning and not trying to interpret someone else's meanings in my life. God usually talks to me about things going on in my life therefore, scriptures tend to come alive for me, but lately I have been reading a lot of "history" in the Bible and am not getting a lot out of it. I feel bad like maybe I am not listening right and just reading to say I did my daily Bible reading.

Then today I realized, sometimes you have to have background knowledge for anything to make sense. Maybe God is just allowing me to learn what happened in the past so I will understand the reading he has planned for me in the future.

I also watched a video today that I find very interesting. It is on you tube, let me see if I can find it again, here it is:






After you watch the first one you have to click on the link for the 2nd, 3rd, 4th and so on till you finish watching all 8 videos. It is about an hour long, but definitely worth the watch!!



This video brings up questions in my mind about what I truly believe. I got saved as an adult and started following Christ when I turned 21. I don't know the Bible that well and most of my knowledge comes from what I have heard preached and what I have learned at school (went to a Christian University soon after I got saved). I know the basics, there are 66 books in the Bible and that Psalm is at the center of the bible. I know all the major stories in the bible...but if I got in a heated debate with someone would I be able to prove my beliefs?



The answer is NO, I wouldn't. I don't know where any scriptures are, I know of some and occasionally I remember one I would like to use in my scrapbooks or journal, but I have to search for hours on end to find it.



I desire to KNOW the Bible well enough to show someone where an answer to a question is or be able to help someone or, and this one is the main reason, back up my beliefs. Maybe this is why God hasn't given me any "messages" lately but rather made me interested in the "history" of the Bible, or in the Bible.



Anyhow I think that by watching that video I realized that, I don't really know if I believe what this man says, I want to...I do believe there is a hell and that Satan(Lucifer) and his 'angels' are there, but as to the degree of the description given...not sure I can (or maybe its that I don't WANT to) believe it. After all, some of the things said sound like they come from Hollywood, and he actually uses an image from Hollywood to describe the demon he saw. I don't know...if anyone is actually reading this blog, watch the video and tell me what you think, I would be interested in other people's views.



Also, if there is anyone reading this, I would like to know how you do your bible studies.



The books of the Bible i have read since the last post are:
Esther
Daniel
Ezra
and I am currently reading Nehemiah
so if you have any suggestions on reading these (although Nehemiah is pretty interesting) any thoughts are welcomed.